Why do bad things happen…

Why do bad things happen to them good people ?
Is it your way of tellin me that we’re all equal ?
You’re the one who taught me ’bout the good and evil…

You’re the one who taught me ’bout the good and evil

Somebody’s dying today and new babys are born;
Some celebrate they life and other’s heart’s are torn;
Some tear at the funeral others party the birthdays
Some say that it’s a zen ying-yang the “earth way”
God gave it a life so he could take it away at anytime he wants
No matter how much I pray when the time is done
Lordy lord don’t have no mercy when it’s time to go
Well it’s time to go, Life’s a bitch, then you die I know.

But God how do you choose who’s staying and who’s not?

And I was praying with all my heart that
You choose not him not her and why not them Crooked cops and thieves
Who took my watch and teeth, drug dealers and killers who just pop and then leave…
Criminals and pedophiles raping
Women and children dumb presidents and villains;
On a killing spree to fill up they greeed to get what they need at all cost.

Why do bad things happen to them good people ?
Is it your way of tellin me that we’re all equal ?
You’re the one who taught me ’bout the good and evil…

You’re the one who taught me ’bout the good and evil…

I’m losing Faith like my name was B.I.G
The life after death I don’t know if I be up
In heaven for questioning you and having a doubt would you condemned me
to hell if I scream and shout the Lord’s name in vain for that I’m going insane
Feeling pain for my main man that left me;
Early no mercy like that thug that I met up in Jersey,
Was trippin for my chain he really wanted to hurt me;
Got me nervous on purpose acted like he gonna mirk me
Shifty undercover cop lowdown and dirty playing God ’s game just to let me know he can
I’m a braveheart but he had a gat in his hand he was a one of many devils
With them heavy metals who likes to meddlle wit them people with haerts of angles but my man wasn’t
He was a good father a son a loving husband
Beloved by the dozen 9 to 5 just to get by a regular dude but he was gifted
His mind was a miraculous tool
Watchin’ his mooves like spectacular cool
He had Passions of Christ and Compassion of Buddha
when my mind wonder off 3:10 to Yuma he dealt wit my pain and many others
For real he felt my pain better than any doctors
He was a reason that im breathing and he’s not no more what for

Lord I know the world is yours what for
He not breathing no more you didn’t have to take him we got devils galore

殴雨

夜明けの犬も歩けば　行き止まり
お月様を照らす　水溜まり
よけながら　ぽっかり
開いた懐に　わだかまり
何故か胸が張り裂けそうさ
喉が締め付けられるような
この要塞から抜け出ようと
試みる度に振り出しに来る
今にも落ちて来そうな空に
壊れそうな迄に　のしかかる重荷

押し潰されそうな気力
CDみたいに　傷付いて飛んだ記憶
嬉しい事も、辛い事も
別れた友、淡い過去を
諸々、想い返すだけで
熱い涙　ぽとぽと
落とす程　心が綺麗なら
きっと　別の道を歩んでるんだろう
目くるめく、変わる街を愛でるべく
項を涼しく、走るんだろう
やっと、手に入れた筈の幸せ
守るために　頑なに足枷
付けて働け、と言い聞かせ
期待してみる 虫の良い知らせ
その日暮らしの　儚さよ
夜の寝床の　暖かさよ
時の流れの　冷ややかさよ
人の身振りの　したたかさよ

だって誰もが指先は泥々
でもそろそろ魂が笑う頃
誇り捨てて積もった埃払う程　　　
景色も変わって見えるもの
人と繋がることにも税を課す
世の中で生き残って精を出す
どうか今日の願いが叶いますように
明日には気分が晴れますように

勝ち負けで決まる価値
過ちで溢れる泡の街
新聞を開けば、嘘ばかり
テレビを付けたら、空騒ぎ
そんな風に感じる時は
外に出れば、感じる一際
骨に染みる　空気の美味しさ
空に染まる　故郷の恋しさ
ああ、僕は何処に帰れば良いのか
此処でいつまで耐えれば良いのか
住めば都、されど都は去れと言う
でも誰も彼も去れずに居る
のは何故だろう　と問いかける
鳶色の夢を、追いかける
独りで天国に打ち明ける
祈りのロケットを打ち上げる
ボケッと突っ立ってるように見えて、
実はやるせなさを嘆いている
迷子のヘンゼルとグレーテル
都会の片隅で震えてる

離れる程、戻りたくなる
荷物まとめて、帰りたくなる
しこりが溶けて、柔らかくなる
変わらぬ物を、愛したくなる
本音はね、疲れちまってる
好きだけれど、嫌々やってる
本音はね、あきれ返ってる
我慢し過ぎて普通になってる
本音はね、忘れちまってる
思い出すにも出せなくなってる
本音はね、今でも待ってる
汚れててもたまに磨いてる 

そう誰もが指先は泥々
でもそろそろ魂が笑う頃
誇り捨てて積もった埃払う程
景色も変わって見えるもの
人と繋がることにも税を課す
世の中で生き残って精を出す
どうか今日の願いが叶いますように
明日には気分が晴れますように

まだ君が住むこの街に
残る想い出を集めに
雨の信号待ち　明日の雲はどんな形
無邪気に笑う子供たち
手と手を繋ぐお友達
の友達も同じ輪っかに
真っ赤に燃える旅立ちの陽

訳はのちほどやらせてもらいます～

goals for next quarter

1. lose weight (66kg)
2. be more social (cusn, mesh)
3. don’t procrastinate
4. apply for naturalization
5. go to gym/pool every other day
6. start looking for summer job
7. make “travelling” plans
8. cook more vegetables
9. write to more friends
10. update blog more often

my relatives from germany came for a visit…

la famiglia

from left to right:
Bitburger Pils (Bitburg, DE)
Erdinger Pikantus Weizen Bock (Erding, DE)
Warsteiner (Warstein, DE)
Paulaner Salvator Doppelbock (München, DE)

yay

my playlist as of april, 2008

the following ten songs have been on repeat for the past month or so

1. OZROSAURUS – AREA AREA
2. くるり – 東京
3. Jay-Z feat. Biggie Smalls – Brooklyn’s Finest
4. OZROSAURUS – Rollin’ 045
5. Jay-Z – Regrets
6. Dynamic Duo feat. Tiger JK – Superstar (behind the scene)
7. くるり – ハローグッバイ
8. DJ KRUSH – MiLight
9. BUMP OF CHICKEN – 天体観測
10. ZEEBRA feat. DJ MASTERKEY – GOLDEN MIC

oh yeah, and rei has a new blog:
http://hmm.ethereal-wind.net/

go check it out if you understand code!

英俊天野のわけのわからない話！②

試験勉強が更に飽きるころ…
いつものあの夜会が　ネット上で密に開かれた

英俊天野のわけのわからない話！
（今会話は消して「人誌松本のすべらない話」シリーズのスピンオフではありません。）

今夜わけのわからない話をつづる精鋭たちは:
宮坂玲 (れー)
天野英俊 (すこっと in SC)

すこっと in SC の発言:
wanna hear a funny story
れー の発言:
?
すこっと in SC の発言:
so when i was little
すこっと in SC の発言:
i think it was like saturday afternoon
すこっと in SC の発言:
and i came back from school
すこっと in SC の発言:
and my dad was eating like a strawberry shortcake or something
すこっと in SC の発言:
and i was like “ooh where did you get that?”
すこっと in SC の発言:
and then he said “it fell out of the sky”
すこっと in SC の発言:
and then i was like “really??”
すこっと in SC の発言:
and he was like “yeah, i just laid here minding my own business and it fell”
すこっと in SC の発言:
so after than i laid on the sofa
すこっと in SC の発言:
with my mouth open
すこっと in SC の発言:
and my eyes closed
すこっと in SC の発言:
for thirty minutes
すこっと in SC の発言:
and then my jaws locked
すこっと in SC の発言:
and i had to go to the hospital
れー の発言:
HAHA
すこっと in SC の発言:
the end,
れー の発言:
HAHAHA
すこっと in SC の発言:
my housemate asked me where i got my pork bun from
すこっと in SC の発言:
and i told her it fell out of the sky
すこっと in SC の発言:
and then i remembered a 不吉な思い出 that went with that phrase
れー の発言:
haha
れー の発言:
that’s awesome
すこっと in SC の発言:
now that i think about it
すこっと in SC の発言:
alot of stupid shit happened
すこっと in SC の発言:
when i was a kid
すこっと in SC の発言:
i think i told you about the time
すこっと in SC の発言:
when i jumped off a suberidai right
すこっと in SC の発言:
from the top of the suberidai
すこっと in SC の発言:
yelling superman!
すこっと in SC の発言:
and then i broke my arm
すこっと in SC の発言:
because i landed on my arm
すこっと in SC の発言:
and the suberidai was like three stories high
れー の発言:
AHAHA
れー の発言:
why are you alive HAHA

worries for spring quarter (boring stuff, move on)

 眠れない
　なぜかと言えば
　　悩み事？

my insomnia is probably induced by my irregular sleeping and eating habits as of late, but i decided i should try to outline my concerns for this quarter anyways as it seems best to let things out other than keep it bottled up inside.

1. internship/career
so apparently now i have a choice between going to new york in october or keeping to my original plan and going to the hague after i graduate with legal studies. whereas going to new york would give me a solution as to whereto go after college, i probably wont be able to graduate with legal studies (or it will be increasingly difficult since i’ll have to move stuff around alot more) and the fact that the internship isnt a paid internship and the idea of living in new york city alone is quite expensive… on the other hand, i can still try for the nlp research position but i don’t quite know how to accomplish that at that stage…

2. social issues
for some reason it’s been feeling moreso as if i’ve either been pushing people away or just growing more insecure about being a sociable person. that and the fact that i havent seen my family in over a year and a half is a little annoying, but i guess i’ll live.

3. haircut
i really need to get my haircut. but i dont really want to go bouzu again, and would rather have it trimmed… or get it cornrow’d like freshman/sophomore year, but that would be too much to ask for maybe

4. classes
i already have 180 credits, but i need the right classes to come up so i can graduate with the BAs in respective subjects. i guess alot of other people are in this situation too, but meh, it is frustrating…

5. consumer whorism
i think i did a good job keeping this down so far, but i do need another pair of pants since my last one got jacked with my bag… also waiting on chris to send me those graniph shirts when he gets back from scuba-ing.

6. weight/health concerns
i need to get back into regular running schedule again, i think i’ve been putting this one off for too long. also need to take better care of myself; havent smoked for three months which is an improvement i guess, but i should also consider taking it easy with the alcohol. and i guess no diet coke and monster for this quarter.

7. part-time
i am officially out of ideas on what to teach the kids, and i think i’m also getting quite complacent about not waking up as early as i need to… need to fix the”early-morning-speech impediment” asap. 

8. letting go
i guess i still suck at closing old chapters and letting old emotions go. what’s done is done, time to move on with life.

9. playlist
i’ve been meaning to make a workout playlist for four months and still haven’t gotten to making one. why am i such a lazy bastard.

10. money
i guess money has been a little tighter in the past few months but hopefully the situation will play out a little better.

11. citizenship
haven’t decided on which citizenship to keep, and whether i want to apply for US citizenship… i guess it all depends on what i decide to do over the summer.

12. language
all my languages are starting to suck, including english. need to reignite my proficiency curve somehow. oh, and the internships really focus heavily on french and chinese, so need to brush up on both sometime before the end of the year.

俺の歩むべき道は

歩まずに
　諦めるには
　　まだ早い

最近怜のかげでまた蘇った俳句ブーム
断じてええことだとは限れるわけないけど、とにかくなせば成るってことで。
でも、さすが15年目の放浪生活はしんどいもんやな

早く自分の居場所を見つからないと

lately it feels like everything is an empty experience, almost as if there’s nothing waiting at the end of the tunnel.
sure college is a learning experience, but what am i getting out of it?
am i going to be living any differently when all this is over?

i really don’t have anything to prove anymore, i’m getting sick of living like this day after day. i quit.

오랜만에 싸이 접속 해보니까 아는 형 여행사진 보면서
문뜩 떠올른 생각이… 이런 사진도 남한테 보여줄수 있어야 소장가치가 있지, 아니면 별 의미도 없다는 것…
여행 갔다 와도 돌아갈 집도 없고, 보여줄 사람도 없으니
뭔 낛으로 여행을 가야 하나…?

인생이란 그 누구한테도 보이지 않는 나만의 사진 한장…

지금 그 사진안에 찍힌 내 모습은 과연 웃고 있을랜지

fleeting obsessions

なぜかもう
　いつもの「好き」が
　　好きじゃない